Day 4 – Vienna – New is hard.
Today we’ve done very few miles – it’s been good to explore one place and know we’re sleeping in the same beds tonight. In the last few days we’ve done a lot of new.
Even when it is good, new can be hard.
As humans we need new for stretch and growth, but for most of us new is a bit scary and vulnerable and risky – no wonder it’s a challenge.
New also costs energy, although it can bring us energy too!
I wonder where in my life I could do with the fresh energy of new, but I’m avoiding it because it’s uncomfortable or feels like a risky upfront energy cost?
My reflection today is around what I want to model and communicate to my children about new so they’re able embrace the discomfort rather than avoid it, not just now, but in life?
What’s been great today has been to spend time in nature at the lovely Prater Park – finding a play area is always a win for the children. I’m very glad we packed a tennis ball – it might not be a football which is my son’s preference, but time to play ball has been good. Enjoying a few fairground rides has also been great (although I couldn’t look when my husband and son were on the highest dutch swings I’ve ever seen).
We spent the afternoon at The Museum of Illusions (perhaps not top of my list of places to visit in Vienna, but great fun). I am also reminded of how helpful play is too! Children are great at leading us back to this.
Julie
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Day 5 – Vienna to Venice – Enjoying the journey
This was our longest train journey so far – 7 hours 40 mins. It was only 376 miles, but unlike the other journeys this was through mountains so a little slower, yet absolutely stunning.
I wasn’t sure how we’d get on with such a long trip, but I’m glad we took the risk. It was great. Sometimes just having time to watch the world go by and enjoy the view is a win I am loving travelling by train as it feels more than merely getting from A to B. We played games, ate a picnic and had a good time together. The significant amounts of extra time on devices have been something the children are relishing too! Sometimes a break from the norm is nice.
It was a soggy arrival in Venice and we ended up at KFC for dinner, but that’s another story!
My reflection for today is when am I too busy rushing to a destination that I miss the joy of the journey?
I know I’ve tried to do this with my children, but in a world which encourages us to keep doing more this can be easier said than done.
Julie
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Day 6 – Look how far we’ve come…
We woke up to more rain in Venice – our tiny window of opportunity for a gondola ride was lost. We took the decision to pay the extra for a water taxi and we were so glad we did. It was fantastic to see so much of the city and it really was too wet to not be undercover! Had we not gone for it we’d have always remembered Venice as a washout. We left exhilarated!
In the afternoon we were back on the train heading to to Rome (328 miles) and spent our first night in Rome eating a meal near the Trevi fountain. It’s been a pretty awesome day – despite the weather.
As we sit round the table on a warm evening eating some of the best pizza I’ve ever had I realise how far we’ve come – not just the 1900 miles we’ve travelled over land, but as a family.
Meal times used to be a very stressful part of the day – not just because getting small children to sit down for longer than 30 seconds is difficult, but also because they were so particular. One of my children had about 10 foods they would eat (pizza wasn’t on that list) and that was it. Going out was even worse – .I felt constantly guilty that I wasn’t feeding my child as I wanted to and judged when we had to have meals with other people.
A combination of growing up and our gentle approach to encouraging tasting new things and keeping dinner times as fun as possible (years of hard work) has paid off and now it is a joy to sit and eat a meal out. I wasn’t ever sure we’d get here but perseverance has paid off. The range may not be huge – texture and many other factors are still significant – but it’s big enough to not be so stressful.
So often we plough on as parent hoping we’re making the right choice so I’m taking a moment to savour where we’ve made huge progress!
To those of you earlier on in your parenting journey I hope that’s an encouragement.
Julie
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Julie is an ICF accredited coach who offers vital thinking space to busy parents. She’s passionate about children growing up experiencing acceptance, belonging and connection. Her background includes working with young people in education, as a foster carer and being a mum. She is very experienced in the additional challenges some young people experience including SEN, neurodiversity and trauma
You can find out more about her work at www.optimumparentandfamily.co.uk
#parenting #behaviour #communication #coaching #learning #emotionalintelligence #dysregulation